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17th September 2004 - Louis; I LOATHE STUPIDITY Please tell me what's wrong with this. Louis emails MAS ONLINE. I'm trying to book a ticket from the 29th Sept 04 - 29th Oct 04 but i'm getting a total of MYR4,799.00 instead of the offer rate of MYR 1,848. Please reply asap! "Mark" from MAS replies back Dear Mr.Tan, We thank you for your e-mail. Kindly clarify what is your question? Regards. Mark. I honestly do not know HOW IN THE FUCKING WORLD I could possibly write my "question" any simpler than I already did. True enough I didn't state the location in which I wish to fly to, but the ONLY ticket with a price of 1848 is LA. But fuck me if "Mark" can be bothered to hit CTRL-F and type in 1848. God damn. In the words of the infamous Memphis Rains "I am a badddddd man." I think i've used that phrase somewhere else before, but who cares. You don't read all of the archives anyway. Back to topic. Every so often, i'm reminded of something terrible I did and that line from the movie plays in my head (Gone in sixty seconds, in case you're oblivious) This time, i'm reminded of something horrible I did some three years ago. Well, kinda horrible. It was after clubbing. 6am in the morning (if i'm not mistaken it was new years day) and I was doing my regular drunk driving habits. My car was three up and I was dropping my friends back. A corner before my friend's place, someone in the back went "Why don't you handbrake this?" Now if you don't know me, i'm famous for doing stupid things with my car, such as attempting to do a handbrake slide while i'm intoxicated, AND the fact that alcohol makes me think that i'm invincible. Oh yeah, and i'm a fucking awesome driver too. So into the corner, I pull the handbrake at breakneck speed, my car goes perfectly sideways and it looks like i'm not going to have any problems controlling this slide. Pfbbt, told you i'm fucking awesome driver. HOWEVER, halfway through the powerslide, I see an elderly couple taking their morning jog as they see my car SCREECHING through the corner, looking as i'm spinning out of control. Alright. I know that every single one of you have seen movies with cars going sideways through corners and heard the tires shrieking a little, but in reality that doesn't happen. In reality, the shrieking sounds like a person running their fingernails down a chalk board amplified by like a thousand times. Long story short, it's pretty fucking loud and frightening to hear a car's tires screech like that, especially when it's coming towards you at about 80. I was sober enough (and skillful) to know that i'm not going to get anywhere NEAR this couple as I had total control over my car. However, they didn't know this. The old man quickly jumped into action, dashed to his wife and pulled her.... In front of him. In the end, everything went by so quickly that the wife lost her balance and fell on top of the husband. I doubt she had any clue what was going on, except for the fact that her husband just tried to use her as a human shield. I was laughing so hard I didn't realise that my friend (Nick) was giving me a death stare. His apartment was just meters in front of the incident so he quickly said "Don't you fucking dare to drop me back now!". I understood why and quickly drove my car to an alley to wait for the situation to simmer down a little. Sure enough, we see a police car circulating the area for about 20 minutes, then we decided it was safe to drop them back. Lets hear it again. "I am a badddddddd man." 16th September 2004 - James: Updates Oh my god I had this dream the other night, which was like the most awesome dream ever and my worst nightmare all rolled into one. At the one end of the spectrum, I got to make out with Scarlett Johansson, but on the other end, she told me that because of her busy schedule, a relationship would be too difficult. It was so gay. I can't even get her in my dreams. wtf. Anyway I had like my worst nightmare come true the other day, and it's so gay because Louis and I were joking and laughing about it, saying like there's no fucking way it could happen, but SALFORD UNIVERSITY DOES NOT HAVE BROAD-BAND. They're looking into it... But fuck no they don't have it. It's such a fucking drag, because I'm actually really looking forward to going on Monday, it's like this gargantuan mofo of a campus that has everything there, and whatever it just looks awesome. But fuck that no broadband? That's just too much. I saw this program today, which was OUTSTANDING. Well not really, but the concept floored me. It's called 'can you pull......?' Today, it was this guy who loved Jordan, and so like he met her mom, then her friends and they all told him shit about her, then he got to have a meal with her, then take her back to his place and try to pull her. It's fucking awesome. I'm so going on that show with Scarlett Johansson. No fucking doubt. Watch: Christina Milian's new video -> MOST AWESOME BODY EVER Listen to: Maroon 5 - Sunday Morning Read: new article
The Characters of the O.C. : Ryan 7th September 2004 - Louis; Articles on the way Lazy louis, being lazy. Back in May, I promised pictures of how an awesome night is meant to look like. The event was James' birthday and it involved approximately 15 people. By the end of the night, 14 were passed out drunk. That my friend, is what you call an awesome night. Murder by alcohol @ James' birthday Apart from that, I have 2 articles on the way and an AWESOME movie to complete. Article 1 - Definitive guide to sex by a sexpert for experts. Article 2 - Ghost stories galore (Includes a personal experience!) Movie - Detective J&L September 3rd |
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