Have you seen the movie High Fidelity? Definitely one of my favourite movies of all-time, starring John Cusack and Jack Black. Anyway, in this movie, John Cusack's character Rob Gordon, ranks everything (mostly music) in top fives for pretty much the whole movie. I watched it for the fourth or fifth time or whatever last night, and so now it's put me in the mood for some top fives.

Top Five... CHICKS!

1. Scarlett Johansson: If you know me then you'll know that for me there's no-one hotter. Lost in Translation wasn't my movie of choice, but hey, extensive Scarlett Johansson in her underwear made it that much better to see. And oh my god, best voice ever.

2. Britney Spears: I'll say it for the last time, the distance between her eyes is no larger than that of any other woman on average. If you say that Britney's not hot you're just kidding yourself, come on.

3. Jennifer Aniston: She's hot come on. I've heard that she's a real bitch on the set of Friends come the last season, but I don't give a shit. Looking forward to Along Came Polly, and strangely it's not because of Ben Stiller.

4. Ashanti: Things that she has done of note recently: NONE, but hey in that video "Rock wit you" she's still unbelievably hot. Now if only I could get her to stop saying "iss muder baby".

5. Jessica Alba: The sole reason for people to watch that crock of shit "Dark Angel" is a real hottie. I'm not one for that bad ass tomb raider chick kinda thing that people seem to love, but she has a great body and a hot set of lips to boot.

Top Five... MOVIES!

1. Fight Club: Probably the best movie ever made in my opinion. I appreciate great movies like The Godfather and Citizen Kane, but for my money Fight Club has to have the best blend of great script, great performances, great characters and great dialogue. Certainly one of the funniest movies I've ever seen.

2. Snatch: Ok, maybe this is the funniest movie ever made. I don't know, a lot of people can't understand the British accents and slangs, but oh my god, it's a crime that so little people actually no about this movie.

3. Magnolia: A lot of people don't like this movie. They don't get the ending, but hey. Tom Cruise's best ever performance, Julianne Moore's best ever performance and probably one of the best scripts ever written make this an absolute gem.

4. Pulp Fiction: Call Quentin Tarantino a hack all you want, and sure Kill Bill was not up to his earlier standards, but no-one can flaw Pulp Fiction, which stands head and shoulders above 98% of all other movies, if not for it's magnificent dialogue, then definitely for it's sequencing, which is now studied in most of the world's film schools.

5. Goodfellas: Amazing movie. Ray Liotta is great, De Niro is as per usual amazing and Joe Pesci... well he's Joe Pesci, but hey. Great story, one of my favourite ever movie moments is when Liotta gets the call from his girlfriend about her neighbour coming on to her. He races over, drops her off and then proceeds to SMACK THE SHIT out of this guy in front of his friends, with his gun.

  Top Five... MOVIE QUOTES!

1. Full Metal Jacket: "Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds, exactly three fuckin' seconds, to wipe that stupid lookin' grin off your face or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull fuck you." - R. Lee Ermey

2. Welcome to Collinwood: "You know, every day I wake up and I say to myself, Pero, you're a lucky man. Your father was wealthy enough to send you to a private school, where among gaining a degree in... learning, you also mastered boxing." - Sam Rockwell

3. Dumb and Dumber: "Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention." - Jeff Daniels

4. Full Metal Jacket: "There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers. Here, you are all equally worthless." - R. Lee. Ermey

5. Full Metal Jacket: "Pyle, you climb obstacles like old people fuck. " - R. Lee Ermey

* Sorry, Full Metal Jacket has the funniest quotes ever.

Top Five... ACTORS!

1. Sam Rockwell: Surely the best actor right now, with the exception of Kevin Spacey, Sean Penn and Edward Norton. Confessions of a Dangerous mind was a bag of shit, Welcome to Collinwood was hillarious and Matchstick Men was great, but either way, Rockwell was awesome in all of them.

2. Brad Pitt: Why does he not get the respect he deserves? Sure everyone thinks he's really hot and all that shit, but who cares? Bottom line is he's a great actor, he's played loads of different roles, and his performance as Tyler Durdan in Fight Club was probably the coolest character ever.

3. Bruce Willis: Hell yeah, Die Hard and shit like that were awesome. Unbreakable and the Sixth Sense were amazing and Hudson Hawk was... ok never mind that, he's the coolest guy in the world.

4. Al Pacino: Sure, he was outstanding in the Godfather part II and Scarface and blah blah blah whatever else. But for me, the pinnacle of his acting career was Any Given Sunday, fucking hell his must be the best inspiration speech of all time, it was amazing. INCHES!!

5. Nicholas Cage: I think I'm probably the only person in the world who think that Nicholas Cage is hillarious. Come on! The Family Man and Matchstick Men were so fucking funny. I don't know, shitty movies have dogged his career; two words: Con Air.