ALRIGHT. I JUST FOUND THE FUNNIEST THING AVAILABLE TO MANKIND. YOU NEED TO WATCH THIS VIDEO. I’M NOT KIDDING. YOU KNOW I’M NOT KIDDING WHEN I BOLD, UNDERLINE AND ITALICIZE
On a bright sunny Saturday afternoon like this, what am I doing indoors?
Oh well, such is life.

Back to the topic at hand, the bras that they’re inventing today are nothing but evil. The special breasts accentuating technology with padding type bras do nothing but deceit us helpless men in thinking that the woman has beautiful shapely breasts.

Then, poor men spend thousands of dollars pursuing that very woman with shapely breasts, unknowing about the lies and deceit he’s going through. 10 thousand dollars and several dates later (unless she was a skanky ho, in that case, 5 drinks) the bra comes off and to the man’s surprise….nothing was there to fill those cupped hands. Nothing but two little mounds with dark coloured sticking-out-pennies.

So I implore you women to boycott these evil breasts enhancing bras, and you men to boycott women who WEAR breasts enhancing bras for you are being lied to. It is my dream that breastless women be purged from this pure sinless world, down to the depths of hell where they deserve to be….and without these lying bras, there’s no where to hide.

*Note, check out this fucking awesome website I stumbled on when doing research for this article. And if you can’t understand what’s funny about it, they’re not female.