MY TOP FIVE FAVOURITE POP CULTURE VILLAINS

By James

 

 

I'm one of those guy's that's always rooting for the bad-guy. And as much as you might love the hero of any story and want him to end up with the girl, you've got to admit that the villains are always so much more god damn colourful. It's villains that keep any movie going, and today, we pay tribute to some of the coolest.

By the way I'm really lazy and I can't be bothered to a)edit, b)capture or c)re-size any pictures, so for this entire article I'll be stealing and they'll probably look like shit.

#5 - BILL "THE BUTCHER" CUTTING (Daniel Day-Lewis)
Appears in: GANGS OF NEW YORK

When I saw this film I was floored. Day-Lewis is a god and I just had to buy Last of the Mohicans to see more of him. Bill the Butcher is one ruthless mother fucker and he has a glass eye, a thick handle-bar moustache and a top hat. WHO ELSE CAN PULL THAT OFF?

Some of his genius lines:

"You see this knife? I'm gonna teach you to speak English with this fucking knife. "

"Is this it priest, the popes new army, a few crusty bitches and a hand full of rag tags?"

"I don't give a tupenny fuck about your moral conundrum, you meat-headed shit-sack."

"On the seventh day the Lord rested, but before that he did, he squatted over the side of England and what came out of him... was Ireland. No offence son."




#4 - THE JOKER
Appears in: Batman (the movie) and a billion Batman cartoons/comics

First things first, in my opinion, a movie that doesn't feature The Joker as the main villain, does not qualify as a real Batman movie to me. No matter how sweet Batman Begins looks.

The Joker's one of my favourite characters of all time. I've read god knows how many comics and tried to understand just how cool he is. What makes him so awesome, is that he truly does not give a shit about anything, and just goes around fucking everything up while on a permanent high.

He also, despite being spindly and whiter than an a bottle of tip-ex, scores a bazooka toting hot chick. Seriously, in comic book terms, it really doesn't get much higher in my book than Harley Quinn, except for maybe Witchblade or Catwoman, but that's unfair because she wears leather and rubs Batman's balls.




#3 - MEGATRON
Appears in: Transformers: The Animated Movie and hopefully one day, the live action version

It's impossible to calculate how many hours I spent watching Transformers and pretending that I was Megatron. While my favourite transformer wasn't the standard Optimus Prime, it actually wasn't Megatron either. They both ran a second and third to my homeboy BLASTER. But even though he was cool and hip, at the end of the day, when I was playing Transformers as a child, a guy that turns into a ghetto-blaster gets his ass-wipped DAILY by a guy that can turn into a fucking GUN.

Megatron was the ultimate bad-ass, NOBODY fucked with him. Seriously, why would you? You think you're hard beause you work out in the gym? Megatron was an eighty foot tall robot. You think you're hard because you've got a big gun? Megatron was a gun. He'd fuck you up.






#2 - DARTH VADER (Anakin Skywalker)
Appears in: Star Wars Episodes 3 - 6


Personally, I think Emperor Palpatine is awesome, but let's be honest, I'd be fucking crucified if this guy wasn't on the list. And I refuse to waste more than one spot on a film concept like Star Wars.

Anyways, on a scale of evil-ness, you don't get much worse than cutting off your son's hand, destroying the homeworld of your daughter's adopted family as a test for his weapon and killing Obi Wan Kenobi, so I guess there aren't many that can touch old Vader. He's still Palpatine's bitch though.




#1 - NORMAN STANSFIELD (Gary Oldman)
Appears in: THE PROFESSIONAL ("LEON")

Gary Oldman's one of my favourite actors of all time, and while I think Leon's a pretty average film, the crescendo of activity that comes around thirty minutes into the film is fantastic, when STANSFIELD goes on a rampage, killing a family while musing on the wonder of Beethoven and Mozart.

I've seen the film about three times, and it's so far taught me only two things, that Luc Besson's choices of music are fucking uncanny, and that Gary Oldman should be in every film ever made.

It's one of my intentions, once I'm a famous film-maker, to make a film that is based around Norman Stansfield, like a prequel or something, he's just that cool.

Back to the film though, after killing a man, his wife, their daughter and their son, Oldman realises that the guy he just shot actually put a whole in his new suit before biting the bucket, he decides to unreel an entire roll of bullets into his body out of the inconvenience he had just caused him. He reaches for another load but gets stopped by one of his henchmen and pushed into the corridor to cool off, where he ends up shooting at an 80 year old lady and telling her to get the fuck inside her house and leave them alone.

Bad ass.



I know that I will inevitibly be left comments and emails about your choices and I know that they are all superior to mine, but to be really honest these are my favourites and if you disagree well hey that's spectacular for you... But do what you will... There's bound to be people I forgot about anyway..