We have been following a random guy through a meat locker until he and his lady friend with the Japanese school girl hair-do get to a club. Inside, there are about two hundred junkies, a very ugly blonde girl who dances around in a bra and Steven Dorff who is BAD ASS. After a while, it starts pouring blood and the random realises he is about to have hit shit totally ruined. Vampires start hissing and kicking him until they realise something themselves; that Wesley Snipes is here. And he is kitted from head to toe in black leather.

 

 

There are few opening scenes in a movie better than this. Probably ever. In fact now that I think about it, the entire Blade franchise and anything it will ever be is on a perpetual downward slide.  Not because Ryan Reynolds is now in the movies, but because there will never be a cooler or better scene than the way Blade opens.

Watching Blade kill vampires to a sweet techno soundtrack has always been a thing of beauty. And you know you’re watching something beautiful when you’re in total respect of a scene that features the star of Grounded For Life with big ginger pig tails. That Blade skewers him in the shoulder twice and then sits him on fire is just icing on the cake.

There’s even a part where twelve vampire soldiers appear with the ugly blonde girl and fire off uzis at Blade. This scene is so good that we ignore the fact Blade doesn’t get hit at all, instead each of the soldiers and the DJ get killed when he spins around on the floor and shoots like six bullets.

It’s sad to think that there’s next to no chance that a scene like this will ever again grace a Blade film, since now David Goyer seems to be taking full control and substituting fucking cool auxillary characters like Ron Perlman (who might actually be the coolest person in the world) for a character called Jarko Grimwood, played by fucking Triple H.